Self-Esteem What is self-esteem? Self-esteem is how we value ourselves;

it is how we perceive our value to the world and how valuable we think we are to others.

​

Self-esteem affects our trust in others, our relationships, our work – nearly every part of our lives.

Positive self-esteem gives us the strength and flexibility to take charge of our lives and grow from our mistakes without the fear of rejection.

​

Following are some outward signs of positive self-esteem:

• Confidence

• Self-direction

• Non-blaming behavior

• An awareness of personal strengths

• An ability to make mistakes and learn from them

• An ability to accept mistakes from others

• Optimism

• An ability to solve problems

• An independent and cooperative attitude

• Feeling comfortable with a wide range of emotions

• An ability to trust others

• A good sense of personal limitations

• Good self-care

• The ability to say no

​

What is low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem is a debilitating condition that keeps individuals from realizing their full potential.

​

A person with low self-esteem feels unworthy, incapable, and incompetent.

In fact, because the person with low self-esteem feels so poorly about him or herself, these feelings may actually cause the person’s continued low self-esteem.

​

Here are some signs of low self-esteem:

• Negative view of life

• Perfectionist attitude

• Mistrusting others – even those who show signs of affection

• Blaming behavior

• Fear of taking risks

• Feelings of being unloved and unlovable

• Dependence – letting others make decisions

• Fear of being ridiculed How can you raise low self-esteem?

​

Feelings of low self-esteem often build up over a lifetime, and letting go of ingrained feelings and behaviors is not an easy task.

​

It may take time, hard work, and it may require professional counseling.

But there are some simple, positive thinking techniques that can be used to help improve self-esteem.

​

These are called affirmations.

Using affirmations to stop negative self-talk is a simple, positive way to help increase self-esteem.

​

Affirmations are encouraging messages we can give ourselves every day until they become part of our feelings and beliefs.

​

Affirmations work best when a person is relaxed.

But since people are often upset when they are giving themselves negative self-messages, they may need to counter negative messages with positive ones.

​

For example, replace the message “I made a stupid mistake, and I am no good at this job,” with “Yes, I made a mistake but I have learned from it, and now I can a better job.”

​

Begin each day by looking in the mirror and giving yourself a positive message.

The following affirmations can help you to work toward a positive self-image:

• I respect myself and others

• I am lovable and likable

• I am confident, and it shows

• I acare about myself

• I am creating loving, healthy relationships

• I am a good friend to myself and others

• I accept myself just as I am

• I look great

• Life is good, and I like being a part of it

​

​